i always come up with these train of thoughts and say to myself, "i have to blog about this." but when the time comes to sit and process unto some form of writing, my head goes blank. here i am, my baby daughter asleep and my son and husband running errands. a fairly clean house surrounds me as i munch on my summer tomato, cucumber, and chickpea salad and sip my iced americano.
and with this quiet, still and rare (very rare) moment before me, my mind absolutely goes blank. almost as if it STOPS THINKING.
it's weird, maybe that's what it needs. to just stop for a moment. to not have 15 layers of thoughts running at once - maybe it needs some breathing room.
i don't know. because it seems i need to take a moment and have some super DEEP thoughts. but when those thoughts do come, they seem to come in the midst of a million little thoughts that are sustaining my home and my children lives like, "make sure amos doesn't fall off that chair or run with that grape in his mouth or don't let lucia roll off the couch or feed them, clothe them, bath them, KEEP THEM ALIVE..." and then something flashes across my brain like, "THE MEANING OF LIFE." (well not that extreme, but something along those lines)... to be lost in the clutter of the lesser (yet as significant in the long run) stuff.
so now here i am, just processing out loud the reality that my buried deep thoughts are found somewhere within my subconscious - in a room or a drawer unbeknownst to me.
this is a weird post. lucia is waking up.
|because posts without a photo are weird. therefore i give you my children.|